Christian and John are as horny as they are hungry. The Bay Area couple have a long history together in food. You can catch Christian at San Francisco's mainstay Zuni Café where he works as a Sous Chef and his Mid-Western raised partner John at the Michelin starred Mister Jius, where he mans the bottles as the in-house Wine Director. When the two are away from their Mission district home, you can find them tailgating and hanging with fellow food and wine buddies at littlebluesf.com

The couple took Mouthfeel on a high concept tour of Paris to find the some of the best baked goods, cutest guys and cruisiest cafes.

Gokhan in Rambuteau (Le Marais)

Le Gay Choc is a bakery on Rue Rambuteau on the edge of the Marais that sells penis-shaped viennoiseries (i.e. Hot Cookie in the Castro) but still manages to look like a real French bakery. We had spent some time looking for hot guys emerging with pastries, but no luck. Earlier, a gentleman on Scruff that goes by the handle “B/D/S/M” (What interests me: tying you up! Seeing you powerless at my feet. Or the opposite ^^) recommended that we try out a bakery across the street called Huré, so we did.

We spotted Gokhan as he walked in: tightly cropped hair, olive skin, medium gauge silver earrings, tight black jeans and a grey t-shirt. He was ready to chat when we emerged. He was open and friendly, on a break from work (hairstylist), had just moved to Paris from Brussels one month ago and was eager to make friends. He was eating a salad (bottom) claiming that since he was over 25 now he needed to watch his figure. If we hadn’t been scheduled to leave the next morning we definitely would have gone out with him to one of the queer parties he had suggested: La Toilette. We hope we run into him again.

Julien and Gabriel in Canal Saint-Martin

Walking along the canal is a gay American’s dream. Something melts away from the hard exterior of the Parisian man’s urban crust next to the calm water and dappled afternoon sunshine. Brown-haired, lightly bearded men smoking and reading, their bodies vulnerably draped across the quai (pronounced: kay), stripes, stripes, lots of stripes. The sexual energy is palpable.

We spotted Julien and Gabriel enjoying some tempting looking pastries. They were perched on the bank facing each other. Two pals enjoying a snack together after work as French men do. They had procured them from a nearby pâtisserie called DonAntonia specializing in Portuguese baked goods with a French aesthetic, in particular the pastel de nata. While the original version is simply a custard in a pastry crust, theirs was embellished with a layer of chocolate ganache, a welcome addition. Gabriel spoke English well enough for us to pry answers to our questions about their pastry passions while Julien mostly sat there looking sexy and indifferent to our hungry eyes. We bid them adieu and headed to our next destination.

Charles in Montmartre

There was a freak wind-storm the eve we were in the hilly neighborhood of Montmartre. From the top of the famous hill you could see dark grey advancing relentlessly toward the city. It was also peak spraaang, so, imagine fluffed looking white pollen/flower shit everywhere in the air piercing your eyes. That didn't stop us from noticing this lanky, loose jogging panted, messy haired, handsome dude just leaving this bakery called Pain Pain (voted best baguette in all of Paris 2012 and 2016) we stopped him immediately. Charles grew up and still lives in Montmartre, but he mysteriously mentioned that he wasn’t staying at home tonight...perhaps he planned on getting lucky that stormy night? He unpacked his grocery bag to show us his seduction tools: various cheeses, a couple of baguettes, and three bottles of red wine. We swooned. As the wind picked up again he mentioned he needed to be off. We wished him bon appétit and hoped for an invite, but he disappeared into the rushing crowd as the first drops of rain hit our cheeks.